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  1. #1
    Moderator thelostone's Avatar
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    A few jokes for you

    A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid. When I quizzed him on it he reckoned he could stop any time....

    I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a coffin, 3 hours later and they're still walking about with it. I thought to myself, they've lost the plot!!

    I was at a cash point yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.

    A new Middle East crisis erupted last night as Dubai Television was refused permission to broadcast 'The Flintstones'. A spokesman for the channel said. "A claim was made that people in Dubai would not understand the humour, but we know for a fact that people in Abu Dhabi Do."

    My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were ?70!!! B******s to this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.

    Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.

    Went around to a friend's house today. His wife was sat there with their new-born baby. She asked if I'd like to wind it. I thought that was a bit harsh so I gave it a dead leg instead.


    I start a new job in Seoul next week. I thought it was a good Korea move.

    I was driving this morning when I saw an RAC van parked up. The driver was sobbing uncontrollably and looked very miserable. I thought to myself 'that guy's heading for a breakdown.'

    On holiday recently in Spain I saw a sign that said 'English speaking Doctor' - I thought, 'What a good idea, why don't we have them in our country?'

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  2. #2
    Elite Member Diablo13's Avatar
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    Re: A few jokes for you

    Hidden Content Thanks for the laugh, some clever word play in there!

  3. #3
    Retired Grumpy Grandad notanotherone's Avatar
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    Re: A few jokes for you

    Hidden Content nice one i like tghe little ole lady one Hidden Content
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    Trust me the devil allways wins ,no matter how hard we resist

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    veteran thesparky's Avatar
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    Re: A few jokes for you

    cheered up my day no end Hidden Content Hidden Content

    thanks
    D I S C L A I M E R
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    I am not responsible for what you do with it!

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