Saw these before somewhere lol
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Saw these before somewhere lol
I met a girl in the park the other night. There was an instant spark between us and she fell at my feet. As we lay there making love I thought . . . . "This f*cking taser gun was money well spent"
red i think look here
Switching your Smart Card
next doors cats kept ****ting in my garden so i used to through the **** back over there garden and through the day the cats would be in the gardens i would keep shooting at them with a catapult for...
cheers all i just needed to be refreshed i can sort it now cheers
i paired the card to the box with the net id different with no joy just was wondering cause i dont fancy changing all the id to change it back when m8 has it back and cheers
will a card update if its not the correct frequencie cause i tested 1 in my box and worked a box from another area did not cheers
ive uninstalled service pack 3 on xp and it auto login now
A man and his wife are lying in bed, when suddenly the man rolls on top with a smile on his face. His wife smiles back, but says 'not tonight honey, i have an appointment with the gynaecologist...
Tracey and Dawn, two blondes, went out one day and each bought a pig. When they got home, Tracey turned to Dawn and said 'Dawn how are we gonna tell who owns which pig?'
Dawn says 'Well Tracey,...
hi m8 welcome to W-O-D
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his
Customer,
"This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to
you.
"The barber puts a dollar in one hand and 25...
Dad with his young daughter is in the garden when she asks?
?Dad?Is that a Mummy-longlegs underneath that Daddy-longlegs????
Dad says ?No sweetie, there are no Mummy-longlegs, only...
Bubba died in a fire and his body was burned pretty Badly.
The morgue needed someone to identify the Body, so they sent for his two best friends, Cooter and Gomer.
The three men had always done...
Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight.
The operator asks 'How many people are flying with you?'
Paddy replies 'I don?t know!
It?s your f***ing plane!!'
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be...
yes doc that worked but just letting ya know that it was there
ive just logged in and on top it said welcome sticky fingers and under it is said
You have entered an invalid username or password. Please press the back button, enter the correct details and try...
There was a man who had worked all his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real 'miser' when it came to his money.
Just before he died, he said to his wife...'When I die, I want you to...
On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.
The blonde asked, "How am I...
class m8 what a smart little girl lol
nice bike i always wanted one i want a scrambler though
BIRMINGHAM, England ? Aston Villa is forgoing a lucrative shirt sponsor to promote a children's charity.
The Premier League club has followed the lead of FC Barcelona's free tie-up with UNICEF.
...
so the council will be hard on um we hope
Cab driver fined for smoking
A CAB driver has been fined ?50 after being caught smoking in his vehicle. It is believed to be the first case of its kind in...
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The clerk says, "Well, he came in here...
This guy went into a restaurant and ordered his meal. When the waitress came out with his soup, he noticed that she had her thumb stuck into it. This upset him, but he let it go. She then brought out...
This blonde was walking down a road carrying a bag, when a guy came along.
The guy asks, ''What are you carrying?''
''Melons,'' the blonde replies.
''Cool," the guy says. "If I can guess how...
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?'
'Not yet,' she replied.
i would ring up the taxi firm and tell them
then i would phone the council and ask them cause they got somethink to do with the licences
A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, 'Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later.'
The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, Sister, have...
delete the old key from 00 and 01 and replace with the new keys in same place
When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said, 'I have a 22 year old husband at home. He makes love...
A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the...
An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for...
When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea. No sooner were the papers delivered when a friend of the family phoned and...
Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, ''Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?'
...
Paddy's pregnant sister was in a terrible car accident and went into a deep coma. After being in the coma for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she...
nice one doc congratz to ya
More than Lucky!
I'm tempted to say yes immediately!
Be sure to read the very last line after the photo
Now I know all of you's have heard of the Tooth Fairy, and The Fairy God Mother,, But have you's heard of the BITCH FAIRY,,, Check Her Out..
Do not fear...the Bitch Fairy has arrived to put a...